Are Your Negative Feeling States Getting You Down?

Posted by on Jul 12, 2015 in Negative feeling states | 0 comments

Negative emotions

Negative emotions

Negative emotions–a total bummer, don’t you agree? Not so fast. Perhaps a quick reframe is in order. We cannot evade them–they inform us that we are not in right relationship, but to what? Usually they tell us that we are not taking care of ourselves and for many, this results from over-referencing to the needs of others, to our own detriment.  But maybe we just don’t like cold, rainy weather. Perhaps these feeling states inform us that we hate our job, or we are in a relationship with someone who is self-centered and uncaring about us.

What to do? Please don’t first consider making an appointment with your doctor as the default solution. Why? You will most likely receive an anti-depressant medication that will directly modify your brain chemistry. While that could be useful, exercising, meditating or even eating a high protein meal will change your brain chemistry as well.

There is no shame! in feeling bad or out-of-sorts for that happens to us all from time to time. Sometimes it may be the weather, sometimes it comes from suffering the loss of a loved one or getting some bad news. Being human exposes us to so many influences that directly affect our emotions. First try exploring why you continue to feel sad, or angry, or jealous or envious. You can do this through self-reflection, confiding in a partner or friend or even consulting a therapist. Once you establish the source of your unhappiness, you can start considering your personal goals that exclude these feeling states. But these so-called negative states are an alert! They are getting your attention to WAKE UP to something that you have been minimizing or ignoring completely. Problem solving is an important first step to change something that is the underlying cause of these unhappy feeling states.

Start with the basics. Consider who you spend time with, what kind of work you do, how you spend your free time and what you eat. Dr, Barry Sears who has written about the Zone Diet says that food is the most prevailing drug delivery system for each of us since everything we put into our body creates instant biochemical changes that can make us feel happy, sad, energized or depleted. It is hard to feel upbeat if you are exhausted from eating sugary foods as a staple in your diet. When you feel energized you will be more prone to experience positive feeling states.

We just may have the wrong idea about emotions. They actually help us achieve goals important to us by informing us that something has to change.  They identify trouble or opportunity and suggest methods of action to move in a new direction.

Negative emotions are not to be quickly dismissed. If you have the courage, I recommend you hang out with them and even dialogue with them to find out why they are persisting. Be a detective and find the underlying cause so you can do what is necessary to move toward a positive mental attitude. And just remember–you always have help but sometimes you have to ask for it.

Posted by Howard Brockman, LCSW

July 12, 2015

The following two tabs change content below.
Howard Brockman, LCSW is one of the top psychotherapists and counselors in Salem Oregon for over 32 years. Howard has authored two popular books: Dynamic Energetic Healing and Essential Self-Care for Caregivers and Helpers. To learn more about Howard Brockman, please visit the full bio.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *